[ Alina looks up at him as he talks, trying to listen to what he's saying.
She's never really thought of all of this from his side of things. She's considered his position and his thoughts on everything, but not really how he feels about any of it.
He's always needed her. She's known this since they first met. But that didn't start with him. Ravka has needed her ever since she learned she could summon sunlight. The Darkling had needed her. The King has needed her. Nikolai has needed her. It's been part of why she fears getting close to anyone. Her life wasn't defined by friendship anymore, it was defined by alliances. By political power using her physical power.
Nikolai was a part of that political power. Not by choice, but that didn't make him any less a part of it. And she knows deep down that if she wasn't a sun summoner the two of them would have never met.
She couldn't hold that against him, though. Life had a way of bringing people together, even if it was just because they worked in the army together. This was just the way that life had chosen to bring them together. And truth be told, he had stopped being her ally a long time ago. He was her friend before they'd even come here. He was more to her now. Nikolai wasn't so lucky, though. He had more to consider. More to think about than she did. He had duty that had made his emotions inconsequential.
And yet he said that to her now. He wasn't just talking about how he needed her power, but how he needed her because he cared about her.
She leaned into his touch, curling in his arms and pressing her forehead to his as she stroked his cheek. ]
I care about you, too. [ She answered him softly. ] As far more than a friend. You've been more than a friend to me for... for a long time now.
I think I'm falling for you, Nikolai. I think I have been for awhile...
no subject
She's never really thought of all of this from his side of things. She's considered his position and his thoughts on everything, but not really how he feels about any of it.
He's always needed her. She's known this since they first met. But that didn't start with him. Ravka has needed her ever since she learned she could summon sunlight. The Darkling had needed her. The King has needed her. Nikolai has needed her. It's been part of why she fears getting close to anyone. Her life wasn't defined by friendship anymore, it was defined by alliances. By political power using her physical power.
Nikolai was a part of that political power. Not by choice, but that didn't make him any less a part of it. And she knows deep down that if she wasn't a sun summoner the two of them would have never met.
She couldn't hold that against him, though. Life had a way of bringing people together, even if it was just because they worked in the army together. This was just the way that life had chosen to bring them together. And truth be told, he had stopped being her ally a long time ago. He was her friend before they'd even come here. He was more to her now. Nikolai wasn't so lucky, though. He had more to consider. More to think about than she did. He had duty that had made his emotions inconsequential.
And yet he said that to her now. He wasn't just talking about how he needed her power, but how he needed her because he cared about her.
She leaned into his touch, curling in his arms and pressing her forehead to his as she stroked his cheek. ]
I care about you, too. [ She answered him softly. ] As far more than a friend. You've been more than a friend to me for... for a long time now.
I think I'm falling for you, Nikolai. I think I have been for awhile...