[ Strange, that she's the one telling him that now. Originally, he'd been the one trying to convince her. He'd been trying to prove himself to her, so that she'd lend her allegiance to him, and thus the allegiance of her followers.
Nikolai had sought her friendship because it was useful. His moves had all been calculated. She knew that. Truly growing close to her had almost been accidental, though since any amount of closeness was helpful, he hadn't tried to stop it.
Now it seems there's more of a truth to it. Almost by accident, she has become his friend in truth. And more than that, here.
He leans back, hearing the tremor in her voice, and he sees the moisture at the corners of her eyes. Nikolai's lips find her forehead, very gently.</small. ]
I hope that you are right. I want you to be, because I don't feel it now.
Don't cry for me, Alina. I will protect you. The worst thing about this is knowing you feel it, too. I always wanted you to be strong, but not this strong. You were still innocent.
I'm so sorry, for what I asked of you. What I keep asking.
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Nikolai had sought her friendship because it was useful. His moves had all been calculated. She knew that. Truly growing close to her had almost been accidental, though since any amount of closeness was helpful, he hadn't tried to stop it.
Now it seems there's more of a truth to it. Almost by accident, she has become his friend in truth. And more than that, here.
He leans back, hearing the tremor in her voice, and he sees the moisture at the corners of her eyes. Nikolai's lips find her forehead, very gently.</small. ] I hope that you are right. I want you to be, because I don't feel it now. Don't cry for me, Alina. I will protect you. The worst thing about this is knowing you feel it, too. I always wanted you to be strong, but not this strong. You were still innocent. I'm so sorry, for what I asked of you. What I keep asking.